The Bull I was feed... and believed.

I have been reading a book called "A House Keeper Is Cheaper Then a Divorce". I have had quite an eye opening experience! First, I want to say, I love a clean house.... but I hate cleaning house! (Yes, I know you girls thought I loved it because I always did it right? LOL)

Here is a scenario... "You have been at work all day, fought traffic to and from your job, and had to work an hour over time. When you get home, the walk way is swept and no bikes or toys litter the yard. Opening the door, you are greeted by children happy to see you home, a clean house and a loving spouse. Even the dog has been to the groomers that day and is clean and happy. There is a wonderful aroma coming from the kitchen and your table is set and waiting for you to sit and enjoy a hot home cooked meal. As a family you sit and visit with each other and have a few laughs. After dinner you assist kids with their homework and then slip into your bath robe read a few emails. Before 10 pm you are in bed, read a good book for a little while and then have some great one on one time with your spouse. When you wake in the morning, you are refreshed and ready to start you new day."

Sounds like a fairytale? I thought is sounded like the life of a married man. It is actually the life of a working wife and mother. They have someone come in for about 20 hours a week and do house cleaning, laundry and prepare and clean up the evening meal. The shopping is done by delivery service that is simply ordered on line.

This is a life that our girls think only the elite get to have have, but should be available and budgeted for, for every working mother/wife. And if possible, a stay at home mom should have some help if she is to be able to really enjoy her children. This was discovered by the author, who was having a teenager come watch her children so she could get some things done around the house. As she was folding the laundry, she could hear her children laughing and giggling as the babysitter played with them. She realized she had things mixed up...the baby sitter was getting to bond with and enjoy her children while she did laundry! See, it really is a matter of thinking differently!


I have spent hours reading how to be more organized, and trying to be less frazzled while staying on top of things. And here is the fact.... we women are being short are over worked!
And men are not and will not pick up the slack, so get over it! And quit being mad at your hubby for not doing it! If you don't love cleaning house, if you would rather be in a career, and then home in the evening spending quality time with your husband and children, go to work and even if it takes ALL your earnings to pay day care and hire a house keeper (and cook as far as that goes) DO IT! You will all be happier.


I wanted to be an archeologist when I was a girl, then I was taught (mainly at church) that being a home maker is what a good Mom does. I gave up the dream and had no other desire as far as education went, because all I could see was how hard it was to do-it-all. My mother was grim example of working and then coming home, only to have to do another days worth of work before she went to bed. She was always saying, "I'm too tired to have fun." I thought that was a working Moms lot in life!

I never once concidered that if had I gotten the education I wanted and been doing what I loved, I could have afforded to hire someone to do the menial stuff...laundry, cleaning, cooking, shopping etc. I don't think I personally would have put my children in day care, but I would have loved to have some one come in and do the cleaning etc. and had more time with them. Then once they started grade school, I could have gone back to work. The kids and hubby could have come home to a fresh clean home and an evening of enjoying one another. Kind of a new way of thinking, in my book!

I have never gotten into my writing as much as I would like to for the very same reason. There has always been so much to do to stay up with the house. I could not emotionally write all day and then face a dirty house and meals to cook in the evening and I lacked the energy ( motivation)to get up and "get it all done" before I started writing.
This book made a point... Michael Angelo, Leonardo da Vinci, Picasso... all men. It's not that there aren't women who are/were gifted, it's that women have been bogged down and unable to do that which they love. Because a clean home and meals were a priority. A just priority, but one many men have not been burdened with.

I am in no way putting down homemakers and mothers. I believe in that a strongly as ever. I am talking about women not being burdened with scrubbing floors, tons of laundry, and dishes, dishes, dishes... Wouldn't it make more sense to get up, make beds feed your children and then head to the zoo, the library, park or a playmates and then return home to clean home, and dinner and when you husband comes home, he sees a happy refreshed wife and content children... and clean house? I think that should be the goal. Not more expensive homes and cars and costly trips to try and relax!

This is my new goal... to work at doing what I enjoy and pay someone else to do the other stuff!
I will be a happier wife and mother doing that :)